Don’t get me wrong. I’m not showing you Amazon’s rankings for my book because the scores are so terrific. They’re not! They only hint at the vast scale of its competition. What can we do to help people looking for a good read to pick our book out of so many others?

Back in the day when dinosaurs walked and I was but a lowly bottom-feeder—one of several assistant stage managers at the Sydney Opera House—one of my backstage cobbers dubbed me Main Chance Werner.

Ye gads! I’d been sussed! I’d believed no one could see my burning ambition to one day become a famous director (well, that was the goal back in 1977) and all the while my desire had been blazing in flagrante.

To my dismay the nickname caught on like an Ozzie bushfire and soon everyone I worked with at the Opera House, permanent crew and itinerant casts included, was calling me MC, short for main chancer. In my callow youth, I was mortified and did all I could to live down the evil of being tagged an opportunist.

Today, looking back from the lofty height of a longish life, I’d be more blasé. ‘What’s so fearsome about that?’ I’d say, referencing a famous ex-nun about to burst into song to boost her confidence. Doesn’t being a main chancer mean you can spot an opportunity and are prepared to gung-ho for it? What an ideal entrepreneurial trait for anyone, especially a novice author trying to market their own books.

Seriously, once upon a lifetime I wanted to be an actor, long before I exited stage left and latched onto the director thing. Famous actor, director, they were my dream ambitions one and two. Never fully achieved but never mind. I recall both juvenile ambitions fondly now I’ve achieved my third: published author of two novels to date, alongside many short stories.

Third time lucky?

Not quite. I may be published but my books aren’t bestsellers yet (ahem). Perhaps one day they will be, when I harness the main chancer’s energy to the long game of marketing.

Forgive me for stating the obvious but you raving on (and on) about your book doesn’t work for long. Other people promoting your book is the way to go. In other words, you need readers’ reviews. The more reviews your book has, the higher it gets ranked. And once you’ve collected enough reviews, Amazon’s algorithm will lift your title closer to the top of customers’ search results.

But there’s the rub. You must have heard of the inescapable paradox Joseph Heller made famous in his book. Getting reviews is a Catch-22: Amazon prefers verified customers. That means people should buy your book before they review it. But how can people find your book… let alone buy it… to read and eventually review it… when it hasn’t already collected enough reviews to rank anywhere near the top of their search results?

Yes-yes I know (now), there are whole systems set up online—free third party websites such as Netgalley, Book Funnel, Book Siren, and Book Sprout—that allow authors to collect advance copy readers in pools big enough to produce huge numbers of reviews as soon as their book appears. Great for them, I hear you say, but what about the miserable novice of a certain age who didn’t know about ARCs in the first place and lacks the technical skills to puzzle out the intricacies of these online systems (who me?).

For indie authors, especially those of us with small budgets, the Big Question is: how do you get strangers—not bots, scammers or the sharks that promise instant sales success (for a price!)—I mean real people you don’t know in real life; how do you get them to write a genuine review?

Success story

Look at the rewards imparted by genuine reviews. Janice’s first category on Amazon is LBTQ+ Coming of Age. The current #1 in there—the stiffest competition—is The Rachel Incident: A Novel by Caroline O’Donoghue which at 10.34 am on Jan 3, 2025 (time of writing) had collected an amazing 11,392 global ratings (Amazon updates the rankings hourly). For those of us with dyscalculia who may find it hard to read digits, that’s eleven thousand, three hundred and ninety-two reviews, texts and star-only ratings included. One wonders how many of these thousands of reviews have convinced readers to buy the book.

I haven’t read The Rachel Incident (yet) but strikingly, the reviews of Rachel sound a lot like the reviews of Janice. Look at this AI-generated text Amazon culled from all of O’Donoghue’s reviews:

“Customers find the book engaging and relatable. […] Overall, customers describe the book as a touching and humorous coming-of-age tale about friendship, love, heartbreak, and betrayal.”

I’m not saying that Janice receives the exact same praise, but reviewers seem to find my book “engaging and relatable” too. If we’re rating on content, my reviewers seem to like Janice about as much as O’Donoghue’s reviewers like Rachel. However, beating the algorithm is a numbers game. Janice has only twelve global ratings (eleven texts) on Amazon. No wonder it’s ranked #696, nowhere near Rachel at the top of LGBTQ+ Coming of Age.

Thanks to my reviewers

Please don’t misunderstand. I count myself lucky that Janice is getting reviewed. I’m not knocking the eleven angels from around the world of Amazon (from CA, US, UK, NL, D, and IE) (that last one is Ireland) who’ve taken the time to write a glowing review. Nor am I knocking the nine kind souls who’ve left equally starry reviews in the Goodreads community. Or the couple of genuine influencers who’ve posted about Janice on Instagram. Or the one accomplished video reviewer on YouTube and, last but not least, the lovely person who left a sweet two-word review at the Dutch online bookstore, Bol.com.

I should also mention the four published authors who wrote generous blurbs for the back cover (filed under What others say on my Home page) and I certainly can’t forget to acknowledge the twelve aficionados among my friends and family whose fabulous words adorn Janice’s page on my website (I promise you I didn’t bribe them) (much).

Indeed, I am tremendously beholden to each and every one of my reviewers! Thanks to their efforts, Becoming Janice is selling, if not at the pace an author eager to reach new readers would like to see.

Back to reality

I’m not in this for the money. I don’t expect to soon recoup the investments I’ve already made in marketing. And that’s okay. But I do want my books to be read. After all, that’s why I write them, for you, my reader. This grateful main chancer is not giving up.

Step #1: as it says in one Good Book (other options are available), “Ask and ye shall receive.” So, to answer that Big Question, I’m putting on my Big Girl pants and asking you (and all your friends and relations), for one Big Favor. Go on, make an indie author’s day! Please…

 

 

 

 

PS: How could I forget the staff of Walter’s Bookshop in Groningen, Fer Dillema of the International Welcome Center North, and the reporters Rita Alves and Marielle (Mary) Spelde of The Northern Times and Brandon Hartley  and Molly Quell of DutchNews.nl for helping me to publicize Becoming Janice.
My sincere thanks to you all!